This will probably be my last check in for a little while. My boyfriend and I are moving about 2300 miles across the country in the next two weeks and so I will probably have my hands full and though I will be posting as often as I can, I don’t think I will be able to keep up with my 5-6 day a week workout regime. So, I will make this post count!
I am at a weight-loss plateau and have been for the last several weeks, but I am completely fine with that because I have seen so much improvement in my muscle tone that I know I am still loosing fat even if the scale doesn’t want to admit it. *Shaking fist at scale while giving it the evil, death stare.*
I have been able to lose a total of 4.75 inches all over, which is none too shabby. This last few weeks I have noticed how much more energy I have, which will definitely come in handy when I am lugging heavy boxes and furniture out of our old place and into our new one. I am not looking forward to having to take time off from my workouts to move, but I am going to definitely to work hard and make up for it later.
Today was my final work out of the week. Last week I focused solely on BBL and this week was all P90X. Tomorrow I am getting a 90 minute massage, which is part of my early birthday gift, I turn 32 next week. I am excited and scared. I have only ever had a 30 minute massage and most of it hurt so bad I couldn’t enjoy it, so I am hoping for a better experience this time around. I am sure my muscles will thank me for any love they get.
I was just thinking last night about how nice it is to look in the mirror and not be disappointed in what I see. When I was younger I used to want to be super skinny and thought that would fix all of my problems. Now I know that there is a big difference between being skinny and healthy. You can be skinny and still be fat. I have seen girls that are tiny little things, but when you look closely at them you notice that they have little to no muscle tone and god knows what percentage of body fat they have. That just doesn’t appeal to me. I may not get rid of that cellulite on my thighs, but I can tell you honestly that it wasn’t for lack of hard work.
It has occurred to me that I have never shown you a full-on heavy pic of myself. From before I got fed up with the excuses and denial and started to change my life for the better. It took me a while to find one. I really had to dig through some files to locate any, probably because I destroyed any evidence of the physical embodiment of my self loathing as soon as I could back then. Well no more. Here it is and I must say I don’t know how I let myself get to that point. I look pregnant for goodness sake. Looking at this picture just reminds me how unhappy I was with myself. Comfort eating away my pain and shame. I do not miss those days.
I am so proud of myself for finally getting over all that horrible crap that was playing in my head all day, every day. I am so much happier now that I don’t let other people’s opinions of me shape my opinion of myself. I am not perfect, none of us are, but I will tell you this, I DON’T CARE! I do my best everyday to be a person I can be proud of and if that isn’t good enough for other people, guess what, they aren’t good enough for me.
No more sitting on the couch, crying and binge eating while I watch the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. (Yes, I actually did that.) No more saying yes to everything and everyone because I want to make someone else like me. No more doormat, no more having friends that aren’t really friends, no more letting other people tell me what my opinions should be!
I took a stand for myself. I fought for myself. I am so very glad I did and I want you to know that if you have ever sat on a couch eating way too much of something because you were sad, or hurt, or for any other reason than feeding your body, you are not alone! You can make changes that will benefit you in every way. You can be happy just being you. If you want help, or you need motivation I am here for you. I will listen and I will not judge. You can do this. I know you can, because I did.
I went from that unhappy, unhealthy girl who destroyed so many pictures of her memories to a proud, contented woman who can finally enjoy her life.
Do not let anyone tell you that you can’t change. They have their own reasons for wanting to keep you the way you are and those reasons are probably not in your best interest.
Make a change! Do it today! To quote from every fitness guru and life coach ever, “There is no better time to start than right now!”
Here are my 12 week results. If you would like to see how far I have come you can go back to my very first fitness post here. If you have any questions or want a little kick in the pants, hit me up here on on my Facebook page here. I’d love to hear from you. 😀